LIFE STARTS AFTER FIFTY
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Openness about sexual matters has been lost over time, and discussions
about sex have become taboo. At the time of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him), the Sahabah were
not too shy to ask about all affairs, including sexual matters, so as to know
the teachings of Islam in these matters.
Muslims have deviated from the path
shown to them by their religion and adopted the path of self-interest and evil.
On the other hand, all good values that were propagated by Prophet Muhammad
(SAW) are adopted and implemented by today’s western world.
Our wives
belong to Allah and not our properties that we own the way we own cars and
houses. Our wives are amaana, a trust for us to look after to gain Allah’s
pleasure. Any man who doesn’t fulfil this trust doesn’t deserve a wife.
.A woman's largest erogenous zone is her mind, She wants passion, Effort, Attention from you.Tell
her clearly You love her. Give her a hug each day.
SEX is a major sin (HARAAM) outside
marriage(ZINA) and it is haraam to deny sexual pleasure to each other in
married life.
There are certain times when sex is more recommended:
1. When a
women desires it from her husband.49
2. When
one is attracted to another woman.
It is
narrated from Imām as-Ŝādiq (as): “Any person that sees a woman and is attracted
to her must go to his wife and engage in sexual intercourse with her, because
that which the other woman has, the wife also has, and one must not give Satan
a way into one’s heart.
And lets not forget even our Prophet
Muhammad (pbuh) was a man as well:
Jabir reported that Allah's
Messenger (may peace be upon him) saw a woman, and so he came to his wife,
Zainab, as she was tanning a leather and had sexual intercourse with her. He
then went to his Companions and told them: The woman advances and retires in
the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his
wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.[Book 8 Hadith 3240] 'The Book of Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah)' of Sahih
Muslim.
In Islam it is advisable for a man to have sex with his wife AT LEAST once
every week on friday morning before jumma prayer.
Islam prohibits only two things between husband and wife:
1- Intercourse
when the woman is in menstruation period and afterbirth period.
2- Anal
intercourse. It is a great sin for a man to have anal intercourse with his
wife.
Other than the
above two restrictions, one may enjoy conjugal relations with ones wife any
place, any time, and any how their hearts desire.
You can do anything with your wife.. Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah
verse 223:
223 Your wives are as a tilth
unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will.
There
is absolutely no veil or purdah between the sacred relationship of a husband
and a wife in Islam.
“When
you intend to have sex with your wife, do not rush because the woman has
needs.” — Ali ibn Abi Talib (as)
Go very, very slow. I
recommend you begin by massaging your wife. A massage is a great way to
learn where your wife likes to be touched—and where you like to be touched too.
Youtube is a great place to learn massage techniques and because Youtube blocks
explicit images, most of the content is quite halal to view.
Talk to your partner about engaging in
stimulating the clitoris manually during foreplay and before penetration.
Remember that it's not uncommon for your sex
life to be less extraordinary than expected. a man's erection might not last long or it might come and go,he may
also ejaculate outside before entering, Being patient
and taking your time, talking clearly, and learning/practicing are the best
ways to allow the two of you to enjoy this newfound intimacy together.
193320: Can she masturbate if her husband cannot satisfy her
desire?
Praise be to Allah.
Firstly:
The basic
principle is that masturbation is haraam. Please see the answer to question
no. 329
That is
only permitted if a person fears that he may end up committing zina; no doubt
the prohibition on zina is more emphatic, and it is more abhorrent and
reprehensible. Hence it is permissible to commit the lesser of two evils so as
to ward off the greater.
Ar-Ruhaybaani
(may Allah have mercy on him) said: If a person, man or woman, masturbates with
no need to do so, that action is haraam and he should be given a disciplinary
punishment for it, because it is a sin. But if he does it because he fears falling
into zina or homosexuality, or because he fears physical harm, then there is no
punishment.
End quote
from Mataalib Ooli an-Nuha Sharh Ghaayat al-Muntaha, 6/226
Al-Mirdaawi
(may Allah have mercy on him) said:
We learn
two things from this:
1.
That masturbation is not permissible except in cases of necessity
2.
The ruling for women on that matter is the same as the ruling for men, if a
woman fears falling into zina.
This is
the correct view, as stated in al-Furoo‘.
End quote
from al-Insaaf, 10/252
Secondly:
What the
husband must do is give his wife her rights to kind treatment. One of the most
important matters to which he must pay attention in that regard is keeping her
chaste so that she will not look at other men, and giving her her rights in
matters of intimacy as much as possible, even if that means using aphrodisiacs
and paying attention to nutrition.
If the
husband reaches climax quickly, before his wife is satisfied, then he has to
try hard to stimulate her first, even if that is with his hand or body, and not
start to have intercourse until she is ready for that, and then she can reach
climax through intercourse.
If the
question is about masturbation with the hand, what difference is there between
the husband’s hand or her own hand? Why can’t he do that for her, and why
should she do that herself?
What we
think is that the husband should do that, and it is better if it is before he
has intercourse with her, then if she needs anything else, he can stimulate her
again after having intercourse, so that her needs will be met.
There is
nothing wrong with him consulting a specialist doctor, if he is suffering from
any kind of problem.
And Allah
knows best.
Most women report masturbating at least once a
week, according to a new study in the Journal of Sex Research. The truth of
the matter is far more women receive erotic or sensual massages than the public
is aware of.
HOW TO DO IT: FEMALE MASTURBATION
Apply water-based
lubricant or coconut oil or cold cream over your hairy area of
vagina all way down to anus. Nearly 50 percent of men and
women who have used lubricant say that it makes it easier to have an orgasm Place
your hand over your hairy vaginal lips and slide from top
upto your anus. Start by focusing on the hairy vulva, which is the outside
visible area of the vagina.Finally, gently slide your forefinger down the sides of the clitoris and rotate around for about 10 strokes. Massage the head of the clitoris in circular motions using your forefinger and thumb.NO NEED TO PUSH YOUR FINGER INSIDE YOUR VAGINAL CANAL WHICH MANY PEOPLE SUGGEST. REMEMBER, YOUR IMPORTANT POINT IS THE CLITORIS.
Masturbating once or twice a week is very common.
ITS ALL ABOUT HER CLITORIS.
Article seven:
Article eight:
Article nine:
premature ejaculation in
man..early discharge..
1.Ejaculates before the penis enters the vagina
2. During the time of penetration into the vagina
3. Immediately after the penis enters into the vagina.
The researchers behind the report say premature
ejaculation is a natural occurrence, especially among younger men and old man ,
and that those affected can learn to control their response to stimulation
themselves without recourse to any drugs or therapies.
As many as one in three men may experience premature
ejaculation during sex."Teens and men can understand their sexual
response during masturbation and learn ejaculatory control without any drug
therapy."
premature ejaculation in man..early discharge..CONTROL
1.Massage his penis with mustard oil/ coconut oil/ Vaseline regularly so that he gets control over ejaculation
2. Masturbate one hour before having sex
3. SEX POSITION SHOULD BE WOMAN ON TOP. Because when a man lies on bed, he can control his ejaculation.
Go
Herbal
-Research
literature supports a significant role of two herbs such as Ginseng and
Pomegranate(ANAAR) in the treatment of erectile dysfunction.
–Ginseng
has been found to increase the nitric oxide production thereby
improving the blood flow. Pomegranate(ANAAR), a rich source of
antioxidants has been found to be beneficial in preventing
atherosclerosis
HERBAL
TREATMENT: GARLIC....Crush two or three cloves of
garlic and eat this every morning. Garlic is aphrodisiac,
Tonic for libido and to maintain erection.
You may buy DAMIAGRA from SBL in India.
Make love often.
This is a tough one to do in a relationship because work, kids, and household
chores don't always leave time and energy for sex with your partner. But, sex
is important in a relationship and should be made a priority. Try making a plan
to make love at least twice a week: once during the week and once on the
weekend. Stick to this as best you can so that you and your partner know that
when to expect intimacy. While this isn't always romantic, you can make it so
by turning on some soft music, lighting candles, or taking a bubble bath
together. Making love will keep you and your partner close and keep the
relationship new and exciting. Without sex, a relationship becomes dull and
partners become more like roommates than lovers. It's important to make sex a
priority so that both partners feel a connection to one another. By making love
at least twice a week, you'll keep the spark a live and help your relationship
to become exciting and new again.
Researchers found that though,
initially, couples can expect to have sex more than four times a week, after
three years of life as man and wife, most couples are lucky to have sex just
once every seven days.
In reality, sexual relationship
is essential and a healthy part of a marriage. Sex needs commitment and
connectivity and that is where most young people find themselves lacking the
adequate energy or inclination," opines Dr Rajiv Anand, marriage
counsellor. According to him, it is not the sexual act that loses novelty or
attraction after marriage but the approach of the people involved.
So what's the solution? "If it's a case of physical fatigue, couples
should engage in scheduled sex. They must plan weekend
getaways or make arrangements to leave the child with a babysitter or relatives
and plan a night out where they could probably get home early from work and
then just concentrate on spending time with each other. If it's an issue of
emotional distancing, communication is the only solution. Couples need to talk
things out with each other in a non-toxic way," says Dr Minnu.
Dr Anjali Chhabria, psychiatrist
and psychotherapist opines that it is more important to get down to the root
cause of the issue than just search for quick fix solutions. "Sex is an
important part of marriage and the lack of it could indicate issues in the
marriage. A declining sex life is a symptom, it's just the tip of the iceberg.
One needs to find answers to why there is no sex? Is it because there is no
chemistry in the relationship or is there no relationship at all? Are the
partners too tired or stressed out? Does one partner feel that she or he is no
longer attractive to the other? Is one's spouseattracted
to someone else? If it's just boredom, couples need
to make sex a priority. If they are too tired to have sex at night, do it in
the morning. If lack of privacy is the issue, couple need to make time
for themselves. Most importantly, couples need to tell each other what they
want. Your partner is not a magician to magically figure out your wants and
needs," she explains.
rachel.fernandes@timesgroup.com
20-something
Most guys just can't stop dreaming about sex every couple of hours. At this age, girls are usually rebellious in their sexual imaginations. They share same-sex fantasies or want to try out bi-sexuality. A 2006 study of nearly 2000 people discovered that 76 per cent of women who slept with women reached orgasm (for women with men, the figure stands at 50 per cent).
The 20s are the time when young boys and girls are most experimental in their sexual positions. One in 10 people claims Tracey Cox have had a threesome in their early twenties.
Also, people in this age group have most likely visited a strip joint or a lapdancing club - with their friends or their better half.
30 something
The 30s are a time to experiment, almost all 30-somethings claim to have had sex outdoors. Unlike the teens when making out was the most common form of sexual experimentation, most 30 somethings prefer having sex somewhere semi-public like the beach, in the garden or on a park bench in the darkness. There's something wildly erotic about these sexapades! Also, high on the 30 something popularity chart are having sex in the shower or in the bath tub.
Kinky pleasures also rate high as most 30 plus couples claim to be giving in to their fantasies of bondage, blindfolds and spanking on a weekend of debauchery.
This is also the time when women are most likely to befriend gay male pals. Straight women love gay men; gay men love straight women. Swedish research is confirming just why the two groups get along so famously - they both have symmetrical brains. Straight men and lesbians have asymmetrical brain hemispheres.
The 30s also mark the arrival of children in a married couple's life, so the sex drive naturally dwindles. But, Cox points out that during pregnancy, couples have sex four to five times a month. Most put the brakes on their sex lives for about seven weeks after delivery, but four months later are back to four or five times of sex a month. Cox says six months after delivery, the average couple goes back to having sex three to five times a month. But incase you don't fit the bill, remember getting disheartened ain't gonna help. Remember it's just a temporary period, so continue touching and cuddling and if your baby robs you of chances to have sex, indulge in quickies.
Most women says Cox in her book experience higher orgasm rates. Ninety per cent of women past 30 regularly experience orgasm, compared to just 23 per cent of younger women.
40 something
Men in their 40s are more likely to experience erection problems. Also, this is the age when maximum number of men tend to be unfaithful. Also, men are more compelled in their 40s to watch more porn or indulge in sex chats. Women on the other hand get sexually very demanding, often being attracted to younger men.
If you thought the 40s were about low libido, think again, while 40-somethings maybe having less sex than ever, the thrust has shifted from how many times in a week to an emphasis on better quality. You are more sure of your sexual needs in this age group and thus more likely to insist on passion play as opposed to a mere making out session.
